One of the supposed characteristics of being “old fashioned” is expecting the man to show initiative under the “who contacts who first” clause when meeting someone new. Despite popular belief men actually like when they’re contacted first. But we can’t say this; it’ll be met with a line like “oh lol well I’m old fashioned” which means “if you’re not going to message me first but not look thirsty doing it then don’t waste my time.”
I’ve touched base on “thirst” before but for the newcomers let me do so. What “thirst” means is being too persistent in your pursuits. This can be anything from too many attempts at communication to always wanting to see the person. The amount of “thirst” always varies with person not equating to the amount of communication attempts plus nature of attempts because “thirst” has too often been mislabeled from that of general interest. Moving on…
Sometimes there are days where I have nothing to say. Other times I’m not in the mood to talk to anyone. But, like the previous statement, it’s met with something like “oh don’t worry I get that way too” which translates to “you’re supposed to talk to me regardless and never let more than a day pass without saying hi, at least.”
These are obviously general statements. I’d like to believe all women are not as cryptic as this although with each interaction comes new sentences to decipher. These hidden codes in your communication tactics tells me it’s either all about you or it’s a waste of time in your book.
Men are tired* of a lot of the effort being one-sided. We’re told not to treat every person like the last but nothing ever seems to change in the cycle. When we’re younger there’s no issue because we’re taught either by fathers or older male figures that that’s how things go. As we get older the desire to nix these so-called rules burns. Unfortunately given our current social construct I don’t see this happening.
*I shouldn’t have to say this but given how much heat men get for having opinions on what we want or don’t want from women is scrutinized (certain things make sense, however) I must elaborate: I am in no way attempting to belittle women’s struggles by inserting misogynistic statements. I’m more than pro anything that brings the betterment of women by tearing down our current social construct. BUT we’re forgetting that as the system evolves we have to do so with it which means “old fashioned” needs to remain in the past. I mean, aren’t we trying to get rid of outdated ways of thinking in the first place? If you don’t want men saying “women should/should not do ____” then you have to meet us on even playing field because men or women don’t have to do shit they don’t want to.